Valentine
by darkmus
Summary: Heero/Duo; Valentine's day and all is not well for Heero. He's afraid to show his feelings for Duo but will a little paper heart change everything? oo` (Akk. I suck at summaries. >>)


Warnings: Shounen ai, angst, fluff/sap  
  
Pairing: Heero/Duo (Gundam Wing)  
  
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Valentine--- by darkmus  
  
::...:: denote thoughts  
  
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It had appeared when I had left to get a cup of coffee. When I returned to my desk, I nearly dropped the fake-feeling Styrofoam cup in surprise. I wasn't really expecting any valentines--- well. Besides Relena's. But, I had already received hers and this one--- this one was in a plain looking red envelope. Nothing like the gaudy, glitter-filled monstrosity that she had given me.  
  
I felt extremely sorry for the cleanup crew that had to deal with the mess...  
  
I placed my cup down, next to the large pile of papers on my desk that never seemed to shrink.  
  
When I picked up the valentine, my fingers were trembling.  
  
My fingers never tremble. I've been trained since I was five to be strong. Not to show my fears. I'm the perfect soldier, after all.  
  
But--- I could feel my heart beating, racing, in my chest when I read the words written on the red envelope: "To Heero Yuy; From Duo Maxwell". My fingers trembled, and my breath was caught in my throat. I sat down.  
  
I must have sat there like an idiot at my desk for several long minutes, contemplating what it could be--- my recent fantasies dancing up from the deepest recesses of my mind: A profession of love, dinner at a quaint Italian restaurant, sweet kisses over my face... his beautiful smile. My hands quaked, excited.  
  
Swallowing in anticipation, I gathered my courage and lifted the little pink heart that enclosed my dreams inside. I carefully pulled out the valentine.  
  
It was a simple red heart with a lacy doily pasted around it. All that was written were three words--- but. Not the three words I had been hoping for. Instead, it wished me a "Happy Valentines Day", complete with several exclamation points with hearts replacing the dots and an odd looking smiley face.  
  
My heart sank.  
  
I rechecked the envelope. Perhaps there was a supplement? I looked inside, opening the envelope as wide as I could, frantically looking for something-- - anything!  
  
Nothing.  
  
I slumped in my seat. Nothing. I fingered the valentine, feeling the rough holes of the doily.  
  
::Bet he made the same thing for everyone:: a voice whispered cynically in my mind.  
  
Sighing in frustration, I dropped the valentine onto the ever-large pile of papers and tapped the keyboard to get my monitor out of stand-by mode.  
  
I stared at the happy screen for a moment. I should be finishing up that report for Une... but... I couldn't help thinking.  
  
::Maybe I'm just fooling myself...::  
  
::Were Duo and I as close as I wished? Could I--- Did I have the courage to ask him...::  
  
Actually, the lack of confession had asserted my fears, that my attraction to that braided man was one-sided. The thing was, I was afraid.  
  
Yes. Afraid. I didn't know exactly what I felt for him, was it love? Lust? Just a simple friendship? I had never been taught what these things were, and I was completely in the dark as to the boundaries of each. What if this was just best-friendship, and I, in my ignorance thought it was love? That I went too far and lost him? That is my greatest fear. And it would be made worse by the fact that we both work for the Preventers, and I have to see him on a daily basis. Seeing him everyday and having him dislike me? A fate worse than death.  
  
::Such a bad pun...::  
  
I decided that turning my attention to the computer screen would be best.  
  
I was in a dark mood, sitting at my desk, tapping away at the keyboard when I heard him walk up.  
  
"Yo, Heero!" he said, in that ever-joyful tone of his.  
  
"Aa."  
  
He fidgeted a bit. I don't ever recall a moment where he could stay still...  
  
"Ahh... so... you... did you like the valentine?"  
  
"Aa," I murmured, not really wanting to look up at his face, but doing it anyway.  
  
He was looking back at me, expectantly.  
  
"... it was... nice."  
  
He gaped for a moment, and then said, "So, um... you still giving me that ride to Quatre's party tonight?"  
  
Damn. Forgot about that party. Quatre had planned this party for months now, inviting everyone even slightly involved with the Preventers to come and make merry. But...  
  
Did I really want to spend the night, being so close to him? Would I be able to, without going crazy? No doubt, with the love-love-atmosphere (and alcohol), I would be bound to blurt out something he didn't want to hear.  
  
"I... I'm not going to go."  
  
"EHHH??? Why not?"  
  
"I... just don't feel like... going to a party that's all."  
  
I turned to look at the blank monitor. I could feel him staring at me for a couple extremely long seconds, and I was sure if he didn't stop my ears would turn so red, they'd burst into flames...  
  
"Ahh... Hmm... so then I guess I won't go either."  
  
I turned to look at him.  
  
"Why not?"  
  
He smiled his rakish smile. "Well... I don't have a ride. And besides, it'd be more fun with you there too!"  
  
Who is he fooling? Fun for him, perhaps. No fun for me, definitely.  
  
His eyes wandered towards the valentine he gave me, tossed carelessly on the pile of papers. Then he smiled at me again, turning around.  
  
"Well--- I guess I'll see you later!"  
  
"Aa. Later."  
  
When I got back home, it was dark. And raining.  
  
I was soaking wet, holding my laptop under one arm, mail in one hand, papers and the valentine in the other, and an umbrella precariously balanced between my chin and shoulder.  
  
I somehow opened the door only using three fingers and upon entering my small apartment room, I dropped everything in my arms.  
  
Not on purpose, mind you.  
  
The stars were twinkling and rain was pattering behind the pane of glass as I muttered a Japanese-English hybrid of a curse, flicking the lights on before bending down to pick everything up.  
  
I picked up the laptop first, checking it for any injuries and then placed it on the nearby "kitchen" table. Then I bent down to pick up the papers, grabbing fistfuls at a time. My fingers brushed against a bit of rough doily.  
  
Duo's valentine.  
  
My eyes widened as I picked it up.  
  
It had fallen along with all the other papers, but somehow it had fluttered to land on its front, the back of the piece of paper facing me and I dropped to my knees, dumbfounded.  
  
Breathing hard, I read the simple hiragana inscribed on the back of the note.  
  
Ai shiteru, Heero.  
  
Of course. There was a back to it also, baka!  
  
My mouth went dry and I got up with a start.  
  
Duo!  
  
He--- He thought that I---  
  
I fumbled around for my car keys, roughly feeling the pockets for their whereabouts. I was halfway down the elevator when I found them and fished them out.  
  
I never considered myself an "aggressive driver", nor understood how anyone couldn't have the patience to wait a few seconds more until tonight. I kept on having to remind myself that it was raining and the roads were slick, but my limbic system refused to listen to logic. [1] But I had to get to Duo.  
  
I had to.  
  
I don't even think I bothered to lock the doors on my car--- I just rushed out and into his apartment building. And of course, the elevator decided to be evil and stop at every level on it's way down.  
  
I took the stairs.  
  
Running up, two at a time, I was panting hard when I reached his door, not having the oxygen to raise my hand up to knock, but somehow managing just the same. It seemed like eras passed before he finally opened the door.  
  
He had the most surprised look, which was made even more adorable because of a smudge of spaghetti sauce on his lip. He stared at me, open-mouthed. I must have looked horrible, with rainwater plastering my hair to my face, out of breath, and, no doubt with a crazed look on my face.  
  
"Heero--- what are you---"  
  
I rushed in, planting my mouth on his.  
  
Mmm... spaghetti sauce... I realized that I didn't even have dinner yet. My stomach was clawing it's way up my throat, but kissing Duo was much more important at the moment.  
  
I crushed my arms around him, trying to feel him as much as I could, inside and out. I was trying to taste every part of his mouth so badly, I hardly registered his own tongue battling with mine... his arms wrapping around my body.  
  
We broke apart, with me breathing harder, and him panting like he climbed the flight of stairs as I did.  
  
"Heero---"  
  
"Gomen," I interrupted him. "Gomen... I didn't read the whole thing."  
  
His violet eyes widened, then softened, understanding. Then he nuzzled the crook in my neck and mumbled something along the lines of "I forgive you".  
  
Then he pulled away, smiling gently. "You look beat. Why don't you sit down- --"  
  
"I think I'm in love you too."  
  
He blinked at me. Then smiled, looking down blushing.  
  
He is beautiful. But... is this---  
  
"It's... it's only 'think' because... because I don't know what *love* is..." I murmured.  
  
He took me into his arms and kissed me gently on the lips. "I'll teach you," he whispered, smiling.  
  
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Owari. (Finished Friday, February 07, 2003; 3:00 AM... instead of doing an English essay)  
  
[1]: Limbic system.  
  
darkmus: For all you non-science geeks (darkmus is a science-geek), the limbic system consists of the cerebral cortex, hypothalamus, thalamus, and basal ganglia; it controls emotions--- which is supposedly supposed to help you survive? I don't know how... *shrugs* It seems like a thing Heero would know. Which reminds me... have to write that fic where Heero and Duo are "studying" anatomy. ^_^ *cough* Which is a PWP... *sweatdrop*  
  
Duo: Yay! PWP! XD  
  
Heero: (*inwardly cheering more than Duo*)  
  
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Comments and criticism are welcome.  
  
Contact information:  
  
Email: darkmus@yahoo.com  
  
AIM: mousie1x2  
  
URL: www.geocities.com/darkmus 


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